Divorce

50% of marriages end in divorce!  Even in the church!

THIS IS A MYTH PEOPLE

Ok.....now that that is out.  Divorce seems like it is everywhere.  My parents are divorced and both sides of grandparents are divorced.  Then my great grandmother was married 4 times.  On my wife's side her parents are divorced and one of her grandparents were divorced.  It feels like it is all around. But the fact is that the divorce rate has steadily gone down over the past 30 years.  

That being said it is still a very big thing to go through.  My family is still affected by my parents divorce and it is almost 5 years later.  I have heard that many times when people get divorced and remarry they face the same types of problems that plagued their first marriage.  Some of the reasons may be that the individual needs to change something about themselves rather than change their spouse.  Of course every situation is different and there are cases, such as abuse or adultery, that call for drastic actions.  But I think for the most part, at least based on my experience in marriage so far, the answer is changing ourselves rather than our spouse.  Elder Dallin H. Oaks said 

     "Now I speak to married members, especially to any who may be considering divorce.  I strongly urge you and those who advise you to face up to the reality that for most marriage problems, the remedy is not divorce but repentance.  Often the cause is not incompatibility but selfishness.  The first step is not separation but reformation.... Under the law of the Lord, a marriage, like a human life, is a precious living thing.  If our bodies are sick, we seek to heal them.  We do not give up.  While there is any prospect of life, we seek healing again and again.  The same should be true of our marriages, and if we seek Him, the Lord will help us and heal us.  Latter-day Saint spouses should do all within their power to preserve their marriages."

I don't want to make light of divorce.  It is such a hard thing to go through.  But I think many times it is a matter of looking within rather than out to fix our spouse.

Going on about the myths of divorce Dave Ramsey had an interesting conversation with a guest on his show about marriage statistics.  The following video is long but really interesting on how society distorts marriage.